Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
