I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize