you mean i was at the winter classic?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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