just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
