had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
