i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
