I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
just found out that she named her cat after me.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
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