did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
