your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Randomize
