I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
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