It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
