I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
