My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
All I want is dick and wine.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
