I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
