It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize