It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
