PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
