Do you still have your period?
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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