i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Your shirt... Was in my pants
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