susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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