tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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