I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
