so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
