So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
she told me i tasted like america
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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