I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Randomize
