They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
