Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Randomize
