Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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