So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize