I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
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