I want to have your abortion
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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