I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
