my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
