I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
lets start a swedish sibling band together
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
My breasts were aching with rage.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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