oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
