i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize