I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
