Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
