Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
