My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
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