sorry about calling you the devil all night.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
