She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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