You're so nebulous sometimes
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
