I am puke
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
home. puking in laundry basket.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
