No, you can still breathe under the balls.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize