My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Randomize
