STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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