i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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