you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
