How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
